What are you afraid of?

I make you weak at the worst of all times.
I keep you surrendered, I keep you resigned.
I make your hands sweat, and your heart grow cold,
I visit the weak, but seldom the bold.

What am I?

Fear.

Fear is something we all carry  with us, but somehow think it’s there to protect us.

Perhaps that was once true for us when we were young. Back when fear told us not to play in the street and to never trust strangers. But the more we give power to and agree with fear as we grow older, the more it takes over us.

Its so subtle that we don’t even see it. Like a familiar companion we think we need to survive, we trust it, because its helped us in the past. It claims to still be working in our best interest and insists that it will protect us if we will listen to it’s voice.

But the truth is we don’t need fear once we’ve grown up. Because fear cripples us.

When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I set aside childish ways. 1 Corninthians 13:11

Imagine that fear is a person. Like Parallax in this clip of the Green Lantern.  (I realize it’s sort of a cheesy movie, but bear with me!) Throughout the movie Hal has to face the fact that he is afraid of failing as the Green Lantern.  Watch the clip and imagine that the monster Green Lantern is fighting is in fact, fear himself.

  The monster taps into Hal’s greatest fears (because he is fear) and uses them against him.

Fear threatens Hal in the worst possible way and almost succeeds in killing him. But Hal realizes something…

The villain Fear, has no power of it’s own, the only power it has, is the power it can trick Hal in to giving up. Hal fights back, because he realizes the only reason fear could ever succeed, is if Hal agrees with it and by doing so gives up.

By giving up hope and agreeing that fear can fulfill its vicious claims, Hal gives up his power. Because fear can only take the power of someone it’s frightened into surrendering. It can do nothing on its own.

Once Hal realizes that fear can only win by getting him to agree with him, Hal changes his mindset.

And immediately the tide changes in his favor.

Hal stops being afraid.

He stops buying into the lie that he will fail and refuses to believe anything that has to do with fear.

He completely dismisses everything fear said by holding tight to the belief that he is unstoppable, he is powerful and no one can stand against him.

Now, I know this is a fictional and not very well received movie. But I learned a lot from this scene. After watching this movie I started thinking about how courageous I truly could be, once I stopped listening to the lies of fear. Suddenly I wasn’t afraid of fear, but confident that it was nothing more than an ant under my boot. Some verses that came to mind are:

Deuteronomy 31:8
“The LORD himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.”

Psalm 118:6 “The LORD is with me; I will not be afraid. What can mere mortals do to me?”

Isaiah 41:10 “Don’t be afraid, because I am with you. Don’t be intimidated; I am your God. I will strengthen you. I will help you. I will support you with my victorious right hand.

Isaiah 41:13
“For I am the LORD your God who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not fear; I will help you.

So be bold, If God is for us, who can be against us?

Be strong and believe in yourself. You hold all the power, the only power fear has is what you give it!

Fear doesn’t protect you, it cripples you.

Fear keeps you from following your  dreams, and your calling,

Fear blinds you to who you really are.

Fear blinds you to who other people really are.

Fear keeps you trapped in the same cycle of dysfunction.

Fear keeps you making the same mistakes in relationships.

Fear keeps you  squelching your true self, because you’re trying so hard to please others.

Fear suffocates you.

So stop believing its lies, and abandon it.

The little that fear has done to keep you safe, isn’t worth the damage it does to you in the long run.

Do something you are afraid of and when that fear rises up, and tells you all the scary things that could happen, remind yourself of the opposite.

Remind yourself that God has given you Power, Love and a sound mind and that fear has no right to intrude on your thoughts.

Challenge your fears, don’t let them challenge you.

The Dreamer and the Doer

Are you Dreamer (a visionary) Or a Doer?

The Dreamer: An imaginative person who is idealistic and dreams a lot. (not sleeping dreams). They think about the big picture. They strategize and plan projects and tend to dream big. They are imaginative and see the potential for what could be. They embrace new things and are a catalyst for change.

quote-George-Santayana-an-artist-is-a-dreamer-consenting-to-3786

The Doer: A person who acts, rather then talking or thinking. The doer is all about action. They are  driven, go getter’s who want results. They focus on productivity rather than the big picture and their goals are much more realistic than the dreamers are.

15067-Wayne-W-Dyer-Quote-A-non-doer-is-very-often-a-critic-that-is

Both the Dreamer and the Doer have important qualities, with strengths and weakness’s. Neither is better than the other, In fact to be truly successful we need a little bit of both, or just partner with someone who can do what you cant!

The Dreamer’s Weakness: Dreamer’s tend to have a hard time finishing their projects and seeing them thru to completion. They tend to give up easily because they lose focus. The get bogged down in the details and can stop making progress. They also have a hard time with deadlines and tend to under deliver on their promises. They want to accomplish there dream on their own, but often times they will need the help of a Doer.

The Doer’s Weakness: Doer’s lack vision and tend to be short sighted. This often  causes a doer to get stuck in a rut and become unmotivated. “What’s the point of it all?!” They might say. They may feel like they have no end goal in mind, and seemingly no purpose. They tend to follow the same tried and true route and don’t like taking new risks. They also avoid change and dislike deviating from the plan.

Here is a chart that shows the differences really well, from http://chrisoatley.com

Paper-Wings-DreamersDoersChart_BluYlo-1

Help for the Dreamer’s:

  1. If you are a dreamer, don’t try to go it alone! Go find a doer to help you accomplish your goals.

2. Try writing down your goals and give yourself a deadline.  Then  break it down into smaller pieces and give yourself smaller weekly deadlines.  Then start doing it! You can motivate yourself, by giving yourself a reward only if you are able to meet the final deadline. (I often reward myself with shopping money, it’s pretty motivating!)

3. Remember that your ideas will almost always take more time and resources than you expect. So plan to have more than enough money, support, resources and time than you think you’ll really need.

4. Know that it’s OK that some dreams or goals won’t work out. Don’t  be afraid! And don’t stress over it! If it’s not working, (or failed) there’s no shame in failure. You still learned something!

5. If you feel like quitting, try looking at it from a different perspective and try a new approach. Or  you can always do a different project and come back to it at a later time. Just try to focus on moving forward in action.

6bddf88dcd50c3da027e2568b607fab2

Help for the Doer’s:

  1.If you are a doer, team up with a dreamer to help you to not lose direction. There’s nothing wrong with having a partner, who can support you and guide you.

2. Try to be open to possibilities and embrace change. Find someone who has a different perspective than you, and does things differently so you can learn from them and try it their way.

3. Give  yourself permission to dream bigger. Take time to dream and look at the big picture then write it all down! Then put it some where you will see it everyday, so it can inspire, encourage and motivate you to keep going.

4. Remember that you can’t do it all yourself, it’s OK to ask for help.  Or to tell people no, so you don’t feel overwhelmed.

5. Be curious and confident, and try to think outside of the box, like a dreamer would. Then go make it happen, you doer!!

the-world-needs-dreamers-and-the-world-needs-doers-but-above-all-the-world-needs-dreamers-who-do-quote-1-1

 

Dreamers are Visionaries

Dreamers are the visionaries of the world

As children we lived life wide eyed in wonder. We  wore rose colored glasses and life was a great discovery! It was such an exciting adventure to discover the magic of a world that was new. We were dreamers and believed the impossible.

So why is it as adults our perception of life becomes so black and white? It becomes matter of fact, with no room for imagination and dreams. It becomes about being realistic. It becomes routine and in some cases dull, and we search from thrill to thrill. It becomes about practicality and maintaining what we have, instead of about dreaming and pursuing the impossible.

I want to inspire people back to that place. There is a difference between being childish, and childlike.

I can’t speak for everyone, but I want it back….. that childlike wonder I once had! It’s not that I want the immaturity of my childhood back, I have learned so much in my  life. But I do want the spontaneity, fearlessness, imagination, simplicity and innocence I once carried.

I want to be uninhibited. To never be intimidated by risk.

I want to be without guile,  genuine to who I am!

I want to trust Fully. To love without reservation.

To always have a positive visionary outlook.

To expect the best life has to offer.

 To always question the system, and the status quo!

To inspire people.

To see the potential in things and and others, that most people don’t notice.

To make opportunities where there are none.

To see things thru and never give up.

To dream the impossible.

To never take being alive for granted!

To see the wonder of life.

To be a dreamer and a visionary.

……. Because the world needs more adults who still remember how to be childlike.

amazing-dreamer-galaxy-quotes-Favim.com-1077826

 

The Serpent King: Book Review

Book Review: The Serpent King by Jeff Zentner

For me, the story was deeply moving and brought up lots of emotions as I read!  And while the  novel was poetically written, it wasn’t annoyingly over descriptive.  Dill, Travis and Lydia were well written characters, and while all of them were realistically flawed, they were still likable. The main character Dill, is so lovable! His unfortunate family circumstances were so sad! And my heart went out to him. I wanted to reach into the story and just hug him and tell him he was gonna be OK and that his parents were wrong about him!  The dismal depression Dill goes thru, was so well written that it felt as if I were suffering and wandering thru the darkness  right along side him. His character evolvement was so satisfying. And watching the 3 main characters rise above their circumstances and learn to be brave was pretty darn inspiring.
Overall Thoughts: The Serpent King was heartwarming and tragic and the characters  so realistic! You can’t help but root for Dill, he isn’t the ordinary male hero, he’s deep thoughtful, talented, quirky, oppressed by his family and completely lost.
Dill’s portrayal is so hauntingly real, that it’s hard to believe he’s just a fictional character!

If I Stay and Where She Went: Book Review

Book Review: If I Stay and Where She Went By Gayle Forman

These novels are gut wrenching and  enjoyable reads.

I will  admit that the novels aren’t exactly lyrically beautiful or particularly well written, but they are  deeply moving!

The writing at times seemed overly simple, with the narrator addressing the readers, as if they were children. And the style really isn’t anything to write home about. But what really made this book enjoyable for me was the tender connection I felt to Mia’s family. It felt like they were the family, I didn’t know, I always wanted.  And the more I read the flashbacks, the more I was crushed by the weight of their deaths. It was brutal, but in a heart warming and heartbreaking sort of way. Reading about Mia’s parent’s broken bodies scattered on the road was jarring and terrifying. Finding out that her brother Teddy also died was devastating and that was the point that I finally lost it. Reading the flashback about Teddy and knowing that he was dead and gone was sooo heart breaking. It was so overwhelmingly painful, that I cried. I haven’t gotten that emotional  during a novel in a long long time! So if you like novels that will stir up some tears, then read the series! Or go watch the movie!

The fist novel was much better than the second one. While If I Stay is from Mia’s perspective as she decides whether or not life is worth living. The second novel is from the perspective of Mia’s swoon-worthy boyfriend, Adam.  Where She Went wasn’t as engrossing as the first novel, but it does tie up all the loose ends left over from it’s predecessor. It does succeed in filling  all the gaps of Mia and Adams relationship and provides a very satisfactory ending.

And yes, I’ll admit that right at the end I cried again. But for an entirely different reason than the first one.